There is no easy way to go from being an eligible bachelor to dating and being in a committed relationship. I know what i have preached about the joys of being single and my lack of belief in a true companion or as some call it a "soulmate", but things happen when you begin to let go of limiting beliefs. Often times it will happen to you when you don't expect it at all, or you are not looking for it.
This is the case for me and how things happened recently in my life. If I offend anyone in this article, please do not take it personal, it is just a recap of events. I was returning from San Francisco from much needed "okay what am i doing with my life and what is my purpose and where do i see myself in 6 months" trip. I went to stay with my dear friend Judy, who offered up her couch and in a very quick decision i had left by 4pm for my drive up the 5.
Being on the road felt good, i was able to enjoy a beautiful sunset, some great scenery and good coffee and the much needed "alone and out of your surrounding" time. The drive seemed to go by quickly and without haste I was in san francisco and sleeping on Judy's couch by 2 am.
The next morning was a group trip with many of my great TD friends to Sonoma to go Wine tasting. It was a blast and it was so good to see so many of my friends. Some of them i hadn't seen in a while so i reveled in the opportunity to spend time with them, get some great photos, have the conversations that are freeing, liberating and enjoyable and savor in some fantastic foods.
Saturday we ended up going to the Haight and walking around golden gate park. It was a great day and completely beautiful and I again was in great company with close friends. After having an amazing lunch and walking around for the afternoon, we trekked back to Judy's place and began the prep work for a fantastic evening. We had a barbecue at the house and listened to some great music and laughed the majority of the night at old travel director stories. By 12:30 we were all wiped and decided to call it a night.
Sunday was spent sending many of my friends off to the airport to catch flights home. After they "Judy shuttle" returned, we took a very nice trip down the coast and visited Half Moon Bay, a glorious Ritz Carlton resort that I had never been to. For those of you that haven't been, take the time to check it out. It is fantastic. It is right on the water and surrounded by a golf course. About the only hazard there is hoping that the golfers are good when you are out on a morning stroll :-). That afternoon my friend Judy and I just relaxed and spent the evening in. As a houseguest, i purchased "Top Secret" for her to watch. She had never seen it and I thought it was time. We laughed uncontrollably for at least an hour and a 1/2, ate some amazing left overs and then called it a night.
On Monday, I decided to hit the road by mid morning. I wanted to be able to enjoy the drive down the 1. It is a glorious drive and well worth the extra hours that it adds to the commute down to southern california. The drive was beautiful and by about 6:30 I knew that i had to get something to eat. I decided to stop in Santa Barbara and get some food. I had played around with Urban Spoon on my iPhone and was craving italian or pizza so i looked a place up on Milpas Street.
When I pulled up to the Pizzeria, it looked a bit too formal or sit downish for me. Something told me to move on. As i drove down Milpas, i didn't see anything worth while. It was about 7:30 and I was getting hungry. I was nearing the end of the road and looked over and saw Taco Bell. I thought it definitely isn't my first choice, but i need to eat. I decided to pull in to a parking lot and turn around. As luck would have it, i was stranded in that parking lot for 5 to 10 minutes behind a very indecisive driver.
Finally I made my way across the street and parked and made my way in the back door of taco bell and as i approached the front of the store, there stood what may be one of the most, if not the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. When she got her order I watched her get in the car and i could feel her eyes penetrating my soul. I looked back several times and saw her smile deeply as she was having a conversation with her daughter. A few minutes later she came in and said, "Hi I am Amy, here is my card, call me sometime."
In my mind I had no idea what this was or where this came from. I did have a conversation in the car that I wanted to meet a non traditional girl who wouldn't be afraid to come forward and express her interest in me. I get tired of always being the aggressor/hunter, so this was a refreshing change and exactly what I needed and wanted.
On the drive home we talked and got to learn about each other. Conversation was never awkward and it always seemed to flow. I was on a race against time since i had a good friend coming in from Colorado that I had to meet. After greeting my friend and getting a great night sleep, i woke up and told my friend that my heart was pulling me back to Santa Barbara. I loaded up my car and drove up and spent two wonderful days with this amazing woman, her two fabulously beautiful and smart daughters and a pug named Charlie.
I don't know if i have ever believed in soulmates, but this quote made me think about the reality and possibility of it all. Richard Bach wrote a quote in Jonathan Livingston Seagull:
“A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”
I have no idea where I will be living in 15 days. I am not sure what my next business deal will look like, I don't even have a vision of where I will be working if I am on the road, but i do know that right now feels good. It feels right and true. I am allowing myself to be open to the possibility of a relationship. People may not understand how it could have happened so fast, or why it happened. Neither do I, but sometimes it just does...