Skip to main content

Midnight mass and me

So I am not church goer, although, there is one church in San Francisco, Glide, that will always have my heart.  The spirit works in amazing ways in that church and if you haven't been, please go.  I digress as I always do. So last night, I was invited to midnight mass by a friend.  My head was telling me to say no or not even show up, but my heart said "go".

I listened to my heart as I always do.  The church was very beautiful and very packed.  The catholics take their mass seriously :-) .  The service was what I remember Catholic mass to be, ritualistic and sometimes mundane.   I stood up, I sat down, I sang, I stood up again, I kneeled and I finally prayed.    I didn't pray with my eyes closed but rather a short prayer of "Whats my work here?"  As you know sometimes the answer comes quickly and other times we have to wait.

My first observation/answer came quick.  It was basically that all the people there were gathering in a house of love and compassion.  As I looked around, I saw families  smiling and laughing, I saw old people sitting together and enjoying the message, I saw new lovers holding hands and kissing and I thought, "This is where I need to be at this moment"  We gather in love and have hope for the future and that's what, in my opinion, everyone else was there for.

My next observation/revelation came as I was dropping my friend off.  She doesn't have family here and this was her second christmas alone.  She gave me a big hug filled with love and said,  "Thank you for coming to the service with me.  It really meant a lot and you made my holidays because of it"  I realized that its not always about me and that being there for others can be just as much of a blessing as say getting a gift you really wanted.  Its a feeling of warmth and love that cant be measured, but rather felt in the heart.

On this holiday, make sure to tell the ones you love that you do love them.  Have an attitude of gratitude that others can see when you walk by.  Be thankful for everything because it is all a blessing that has bought you to this point in your life.  So for all of you that I haven't talked to in a while and those that texted, tweeted, facebooked, kik'd, and google plus'd this morning, I love you and am thankful for everyone of you.  I wouldn't be here without you today.  I am blessed and grateful.

Happy holidays

Until next time...


Popular posts from this blog

Feels like a throat punch to my heart

So, I thought today was going to be just another Sunday of lounging around and netflixing.  I don't think I have ever been so wrong in my life.  To start with, Facebook reminded me of my memories.  I happened to click on a friends link and decided to follow another link to my very first girlfriends sisters page.  Its random how I got there, but I blame facebook.

To my shock, I saw that her sister had passed on the 22nd of November.  I was shocked because I knew that she wasn't that old.  I reached out to an old mutual acquaintance and found out it was pretty sudden and unexpected.  That had me in some kinda mood.  Because of that, I began to text and email friends and check in and make sure then were okay.

I got a text message from a close colleague I used to work with at a previous job.

Beck: "whats shakin CB"
Me: "Not much just wanted to say hello.  Had a wake up call today.  Found out first girlfriends sister just passed away.  So sad...she was young"

Screw back up plans

Yes I said it.  Yes I have had quite a few unsuccessful ventures and I have recently started reading blogs that suggest backup plans.  I don't agree and I will tell you why.

When you have a back up plan you have an "oh shit that didn't work and I have to do something about it". Its like whatever it is going on in your life is going to fail or stop being at some point. Newsflash: You are correct!  NOTHING lasts forever. Your job, your marriage, your income stream, your family and most certainly not your startup or your job.  For those of you wishing to go back to the old days, its not going to happen.  The age of chivalry is dying and the startup that you create will be dead within 10-15 years.  We don't live in our parents or grandparents economy. Hell the way we communicate is changing. See example below and try and decipher what I am saying to you


Did you figure it out yet.  If so, please pat yourself …

Just a friendly update on me :-)

Hey everyone

Just wanted to give an update. You may remember that I said I was going to be coming back to California, well it is official.  I am heading down May 1. I will most likely take the train and stop in Napa to visit my cousin Stephen Bordes at his winery for a day or two.  From there, I will catch a train to San diego.

I am currently looking for work and open to any positions that may be available, I just ask that you don't hold it against me because I have a masters degree.  I have seen many companies shy away from hiring me because I have a Masters Degree.  I am honestly looking to get off my feet and find a base of operation. My home is California and I know that now.  I am native and the air, soil and water are in my bones.

I am looking to establish which means I will need to find a place to live (that I pay for monthly), maybe even get a car (down the road) for now I know that I will have to use the bus and I am okay with that. I am nervous as hell about this move …