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connected, its what we really want in life

Never refuse any advance of friendship, for if nine out of ten bring you nothing, one alone may repay you.

Madame de Tencin

You know it occurred to me as i woke up this morning and gave thanks for all the amazing things, people and friends and as i was checking my email and my facebook, myspace, twitter, flutter, bitter, butter and 9000 other sites for new messages, that what I really long for is a connection. A sense of being connected with the world and that my friends love me or still remotely care about me. Sense of being connected and having good friends really matters to me. I would have to say it is top 10 in my book.

Some people need validation by being married or being in a loving relationship. Others validate by how much money is in their bank account. I measure by the friendships that i have and maintain. Sometimes I wonder if people get offended that I only send them a birthday card once a year, or say hi when i see that they have updated their myspace or facebook page. I think there is something in my brain that says, “hey you haven’t spoken to this person in a while” say hey and check in.

I like knowing i am connected and that people care. It is what is missing in our daily lives, the connection and being in the now. We look down all the time and never see the people looking back at us, we fail to give a smile becasue we are afraid or insecure, we fail to offer a compassionate touch because we are afraid of sexual harrasment. We fail to be human because we live in fear and that isn’t life. I live, i love and I do care....


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Feels like a throat punch to my heart

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To my shock, I saw that her sister had passed on the 22nd of November.  I was shocked because I knew that she wasn't that old.  I reached out to an old mutual acquaintance and found out it was pretty sudden and unexpected.  That had me in some kinda mood.  Because of that, I began to text and email friends and check in and make sure then were okay.

I got a text message from a close colleague I used to work with at a previous job.

Beck: "whats shakin CB"
Me: "Not much just wanted to say hello.  Had a wake up call today.  Found out first girlfriends sister just passed away.  So sad...she was young"

Screw back up plans

Yes I said it.  Yes I have had quite a few unsuccessful ventures and I have recently started reading blogs that suggest backup plans.  I don't agree and I will tell you why.

When you have a back up plan you have an "oh shit that didn't work and I have to do something about it". Its like whatever it is going on in your life is going to fail or stop being at some point. Newsflash: You are correct!  NOTHING lasts forever. Your job, your marriage, your income stream, your family and most certainly not your startup or your job.  For those of you wishing to go back to the old days, its not going to happen.  The age of chivalry is dying and the startup that you create will be dead within 10-15 years.  We don't live in our parents or grandparents economy. Hell the way we communicate is changing. See example below and try and decipher what I am saying to you


Did you figure it out yet.  If so, please pat yourself …

Just a friendly update on me :-)

Hey everyone

Just wanted to give an update. You may remember that I said I was going to be coming back to California, well it is official.  I am heading down May 1. I will most likely take the train and stop in Napa to visit my cousin Stephen Bordes at his winery for a day or two.  From there, I will catch a train to San diego.

I am currently looking for work and open to any positions that may be available, I just ask that you don't hold it against me because I have a masters degree.  I have seen many companies shy away from hiring me because I have a Masters Degree.  I am honestly looking to get off my feet and find a base of operation. My home is California and I know that now.  I am native and the air, soil and water are in my bones.

I am looking to establish which means I will need to find a place to live (that I pay for monthly), maybe even get a car (down the road) for now I know that I will have to use the bus and I am okay with that. I am nervous as hell about this move …