Skip to main content

Posts

Distractions and realities

This is not going to be easy but I promise to keep it real.  I have a disease that I am not comfortable sharing with anyone. It's a disease that is starting to affect everyone. It's the disease of anti socialism. Its crept into my life and I now see it affecting a vast majority of people in everyday life.

You may not notice it right away, but it's this constant distraction away from what is right in front of us. Good friends, great company, enlightening conversation, & beautiful music. It's the device that keeps our heads buried into a story on snapchat a 100 or a thousand miles away. It's the instagram of someone having a great vacation and eating like a millionaire, while you can barely pay the rent.  It's the guy that's buried in his headphones and music while shoveling food at a non stop rate into his mouth, while no one will talk to him because he is obese.

We are killing ourselves on the daily by working hours at a job we aren't passionate ab…
Recent posts

Travel and its possibilities

The more I think about it, the more I miss travel.  To the point that it pits my soul. I remember getting on the plane to Sweden and I was in 7th heaven. Its as if my body and spirit were in line. Nothing in life puts a bigger smile on my face.

I think it started when I was kid and my fathers damn travel agency.  Damn you dad. I still have a book i made for him in 2nd grade and its a picture of me standing in front of the travel agency. I have a goofy smile on my face and for those of you that know me now, you will recognize it, because it rears its ugly (or cuteness) at this age often.

It was my second grade class at Park Dale Lane in a galaxy far far away, in an age, well lets just say before cell phones, instagram and snappie. We had a bring your parent to school day, however, my dad arranged for a field trip.  We went to his office. He showed all my classmates around and showed them the computers and they were all fascinated.

He told them what he did and how it was that they wer…

Just a friendly update on me :-)

Hey everyone

Just wanted to give an update. You may remember that I said I was going to be coming back to California, well it is official.  I am heading down May 1. I will most likely take the train and stop in Napa to visit my cousin Stephen Bordes at his winery for a day or two.  From there, I will catch a train to San diego.

I am currently looking for work and open to any positions that may be available, I just ask that you don't hold it against me because I have a masters degree.  I have seen many companies shy away from hiring me because I have a Masters Degree.  I am honestly looking to get off my feet and find a base of operation. My home is California and I know that now.  I am native and the air, soil and water are in my bones.

I am looking to establish which means I will need to find a place to live (that I pay for monthly), maybe even get a car (down the road) for now I know that I will have to use the bus and I am okay with that. I am nervous as hell about this move …

Good Friends

So I have a very good friend named Jason.  I don't hear from him that much, but 1 time a year, I can always expect a card from him. The marvelous day in question is: Groundhog day.  For the past 9 years, without fail, Jason has sent cards to his closest friends.  I always seem to forget it is coming, until I get home and see it. 
I really appreciate it.  I mean in a digital age where everything is emailed, texted, tweeted, or snapped, it is nice to get something physical in the mail, like a card or a letter.  I could be having the crappiest day on earth, but for some reason, Jason's cards always warm me up. In some way its a reminder that I am human and that I made enough difference in someones life that they actually like me and want to keep in touch with me.
After getting his card, I immediately busted out my fountain pen and began writing to people that I care about. I have quite a few, but I touched a few people that were heavy on my mind.  I am currently writing this to hon…

Love lights the loss candle

For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.  Khalil Gibran
Another beautiful Soul left this realm yesterday.  She passed peacefully in the morning.  She was the epitome of love and kindness. She loved all her children and grandchildren dearly.  I will miss her sweet soft loving voice on the other end of the phone.  So blessed that I was able to travel to Sweden to see her one last time before she left, no less on her 100th birthday. 
It's a cruel world, we've so much to loseAnd what we have to learn, we rarely choose
George Michael

She will be sadly missed but she has lived a wonderful life, 100 years long.  She saw plenty in her long life.  I will cherish the memories of her visiting, making her famous cinnamon rolls and saffron bread, sitting with her and sharing breakfast and tea and most of all, her wonderful smile and her continued and constant love for me.

You are loved and missed and until we meet again.

Until next time...

Redemption...

5 out of 5 stars (for me)
So I had the gnawing feeling to go see the movie "Nocturnal Animals"  Tom Ford is, in my humbled opinion, one of the best directors/movies makers in the business.  There is a reason it took him 7 years to go from "A Single Man" to this particular movie and that word is brilliance.  He doesn't rush things and takes his time with everything.  That is exactly what he did in the making of this movie.

The movie is based off the book "Tony & Susan".  The book was released in 1993 and was turned down by 11 publishers and eventually picked up by the 12th called Baskerville publishers.  (12 is a significant number in my life so it coincides nicely with this story).


The movie seems to follow the book pretty closely except for some tangents to make the story possibly much more watchable (dramatic effect). As with all Tom Ford Movies, he draws you in with the grotesque and the beautiful coexisting in a space we know as life.  The cr…

Feels like a throat punch to my heart

So, I thought today was going to be just another Sunday of lounging around and netflixing.  I don't think I have ever been so wrong in my life.  To start with, Facebook reminded me of my memories.  I happened to click on a friends link and decided to follow another link to my very first girlfriends sisters page.  Its random how I got there, but I blame facebook.

To my shock, I saw that her sister had passed on the 22nd of November.  I was shocked because I knew that she wasn't that old.  I reached out to an old mutual acquaintance and found out it was pretty sudden and unexpected.  That had me in some kinda mood.  Because of that, I began to text and email friends and check in and make sure then were okay.

I got a text message from a close colleague I used to work with at a previous job.

Beck: "whats shakin CB"
Me: "Not much just wanted to say hello.  Had a wake up call today.  Found out first girlfriends sister just passed away.  So sad...she was young"
B…