2 Years in This Journal, now a blog

Its coming up on 2 years since i started this journal and I am not even 1/2 way through. I lack direction and motivation. When will you choose to end this cycle chad. When will you Chaddy boy start accepting responisibility for your life. Here it is 2 years later and you are still in the same predicament. No money and buying things you cannot afford.

We leave for Paris soon and for the first time in my life I am not happy to be going. I don't feel like I deserve to be going. I feel that I need to stay here and earn my responsibility. On the other hand, If I don't go, I will be hated by all including me. I am caught between the devil and the deep blue sea. What should I do?

In a way, I wish my dad was here to talk to. He always seemed to have the right answer at the time. I am not where I want to be because I don't take responsibility for my lack of choices. I need to make a work decision and soon.

Until next time...

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