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Realization

Sometimes I stare at my computer wondering what to write, other times it comes to me as in a vision. This is not one of the vision times, but rather a realization. Someone very close to me said one time, "Are you in love with me, or in love with the idea of being in love with me" I never really knew what that meant. I always said I was in love with her, but as time has passed and life lessons have been learned, I think that I may have been in love with the idea. Many times the idea of being with someone you love, or the thought of settling in, or possibly having kids and a house. I hadn't given it much thought, but sometimes that idea is better than the actual act of love; or is it?

Recent events in my life have me realizing this truth that someone could like you for the idea of what you bring, maybe not that you bring love to the table. Maybe its a good thing, maybe not. Maybe I am over thinking the situation or maybe its just how i feel. I have had a vision in my head that I would be a great "ideal" husband and maybe that is my limiting belief. Maybe the idea that I think no one could love me for me puts the "ideal" vision in my head. Many times its wanting that other person to send you a text, or give you a call, or say to hell with convention...lets to something out of the ordinary. Maybe that is just the fantasy in my head. Maybe I am not a good person to deal with emotions, but rather go back to logic and what makes sense?

Until next time....

Comments

  1. You keep summarizing all the random, jumbled thoughts that run around in my head . . .

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  2. i sometimes just try to listen to my intuition when it comes to love. try to stay open to love-as-it-is and conscious of it. easier said than done, but i've found that it helps settle my thoughts and feelings and opens me to whatever the next step might be...

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